The Lighter Side of Retirement..........

A few important facts about retirements that actually makes it seem like a prospect looking forward to...

Question: How many days in a week?
Answer:
6 Saturdays, 1 Sunday

Question:
When is a retiree's bedtime?
Answer: Three hours after they fall asleep in the recliner.

Question:
How many retirees to change a light bulb?
Answer:
Only one but it might take all day.

Question:
What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
Answer:
There is not enough time to get everything done.

Question:
Why don't retirees mind being called seniors?
Answer:
The term comes with a 10% discount.

Question:
Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
Answer:
Tied shoes.

Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
Answer:
They are the only ones who have the time.

Question:
What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
Answer:
NUTS!

Question:
Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
Answer:
They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.

Question:
What do retirees call a long lunch?
Answer:
Normal.

Question:
What is the best way to describe retirement?
Answer:
The never ending coffee break.

Question:
What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
Answer:
If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.

QUESTION: What do you do all week?
Answer:
Monday through Friday, NOTHING..... Saturday and Sunday, I rest........

Short jokes that landed in my inbox...

 To all connoisseurs of good puns... ****************** How does an attorney sleep?  First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other si...

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